








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1466 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 614 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8503 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,990 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5418 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6403 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5672 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4497 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,220,730 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shrqnk | 60% | 62 |
| #2 | Yumai | 53% | 43 |
| #3 | TheHero1994 | 53% | 118 |
| #4 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 52% | 100 |
| #5 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 51% | 132 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 52% | 100 |
| #5 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 51% | 132 |
| #6 | KKS | 49% | 91 |
| #7 | Lama | 49% | 139 |
| #8 | KoriFee | 46% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lama | 12 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | TheHero1994 | 11 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | KKS | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 439 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | KKS | 385 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | ₷☯𝓁𝒾𝒟.- | 302 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | KoriFee | 280 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #5 | Lama | 223 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | +1.29 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | KoriFee | +0.93 | 79 | 80 |
| #3 | Yumai | +0.90 | 67 | 47 |
| #4 | amg enjoyer | +0.88 | 74 | 57 |
| #5 | TheHero1994 | +0.86 | 68 | 65 |





