








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 697 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 526 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 100 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




71 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4502 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,832 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7135 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7205 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6354 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 7138 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,386,012 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 354 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrTrans | 58% | 43 |
| #2 | Maklikklak | 51% | 137 |
| #3 | playnekk | 50% | 137 |
| #4 | P1etras | 50% | 341 |
| #5 | PapaBamb00s | 49% | 334 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | P1etras | 50% | 341 |
| #5 | PapaBamb00s | 49% | 334 |
| #6 | Habib al Habar | 46% | 261 |
| #7 | wide peek Furi | 44% | 275 |
| #8 | ♏Pozioomka♏ | 35% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PapaBamb00s | 76 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | wide peek Furi | 36 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | playnekk | 25 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | P1etras | 12 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Maklikklak | 12 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1etras | 1280 | 0.17 | 33 min |
| #2 | PapaBamb00s | 955 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #3 | wide peek Furi | 954 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #4 | playnekk | 331 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | Maklikklak | 257 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrTrans | +1.75 | 54 | 54 |
| #2 | P1etras | +1.27 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | wide peek Furi | +1.13 | 60 | 67 |
| #4 | PapaBamb00s | +0.90 | 62 | 61 |
| #5 | B1RDUCH | +0.19 | 44 | 70 |





