








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 169 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5080 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,714 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2983 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3905 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3764 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3062 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,583,621 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Ather87 | 49% | 284 |
| #7 | itsWafflev | 48% | 133 |
| #8 | Amend | 48% | 275 |
| #9 | P1nkC4t | 46% | 26 |
| #10 | Zenku | 41% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ather87 | 46 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | Ozzy | 24 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Amend | 21 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | 15 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | zartyyy | 11 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ozzy | 1025 | 0.13 | 29 min |
| #2 | Ather87 | 636 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | Amend | 456 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #4 | itsWafflev | 281 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | zartyyy | 246 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ozzy | +3.20 | 88 | 72 |
| #2 | ♿Chair | +0.99 | 59 | 57 |
| #3 | Frankz | +0.30 | 73 | 58 |
| #4 | zartyyy | +0.21 | 80 | 43 |
| #5 | zLukaH_ | -0.48 | 63 | 53 |





