








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 227 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1944 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,100 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2157 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1945 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1153 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1845 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $435,010 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamie | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | austin | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Juli | 61% | 54 |
| #4 | vanessa | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | GooseBreeder | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Emy | 58% | 19 |
| #7 | spud | 55% | 11 |
| #8 | PwnAlone | 54% | 13 |
| #9 | zee | 50% | 10 |
| #10 | marie | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juli | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | austin | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | marie | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Jamie | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | austin | 177 | 0.38 | 5 min |
| #2 | Emy | 145 | 0.31 | 4 min |
| #3 | Juli | 143 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | GooseBreeder | 130 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| #5 | vanessa | 90 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PwnAlone | +3.64 | 92 | 76 |
| #2 | spud | +2.68 | 88 | 69 |
| #3 | austin | +2.67 | 95 | 69 |
| #4 | Emy | +1.99 | 93 | 70 |
| #5 | bibiahn | +1.66 | 88 | 70 |





