










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
939 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1022 | 30% |
| Smokes | 807 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 723 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 845 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $301,066 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | bibiahn | 58% | 19 |
| #10 | PwnAlone | 50% | 8 |
| #11 | marie | 50% | 24 |
| #12 | vanessa | 44% | 16 |
| #13 | Lionheart - 尺卂丨几爪卂Ҝ乇尺 | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lou | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | marie | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | EliGE | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | vanessa | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GooseBreeder | 432 | 0.34 | 12 min |
| #2 | lou | 100 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | bibiahn | 70 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | vanessa | 69 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | EliGE | 67 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EliGE | +6.35 | 95 | 64 |
| #2 | lou | +2.34 | 87 | 59 |
| #3 | PwnAlone | +2.04 | 90 | 61 |
| #4 | REKMEISTER | +1.77 | 87 | 69 |
| #5 | Emy | +1.50 | 88 | 60 |





