








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
368 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,084 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 195 | 18% |
| Smokes | 334 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 284 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 271 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $299,736 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0BZEN | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | TOSTI | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | Zcamt | 47% | 68 |
| #4 | Za1ver | 46% | 68 |
| #5 | Peter | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0BZEN | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | TOSTI | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | Zcamt | 47% | 68 |
| #4 | Za1ver | 46% | 68 |
| #5 | Peter | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Za1ver | 16 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | TOSTI | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Zcamt | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | N0BZEN | 1 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zcamt | 206 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | TOSTI | 164 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | Za1ver | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | N0BZEN | 18 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zcamt | +4.45 | 93 | 72 |
| #2 | TOSTI | +2.39 | 82 | 74 |
| #3 | Za1ver | +0.50 | 51 | 56 |
| #4 | N0BZEN | -0.62 | 57 | 43 |
| #5 | Peter | -2.95 | 46 | 12 |





