








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




82 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1910 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,131 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 612 | 20% |
| Smokes | 537 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 771 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1211 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $150,187 of utility $27 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 298 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryyphon | 66% | 29 |
| #2 | TittieMilk | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | ★HittuLegend | 55% | 190 |
| #4 | Z̷̽̋'s | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | Playing 1 Handed | 48% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z̷̽̋'s | 294 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | ★HittuLegend | 157 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | Playing 1 Handed | 136 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | xX_SAUSAGE_Xx | 99 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Gryyphon | 72 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★HittuLegend | +8.09 | 89 | 39 |
| #2 | Gryyphon | +1.08 | 71 | 62 |
| #3 | xX_FairyPrinces_Xx | -0.04 | 53 | 23 |
| #4 | TittieMilk | -1.46 | 36 | 55 |
| #5 | Azrāʾīl (ملك الموت عزرائيل) | -1.69 | 50 | 50 |





