








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




126 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1829 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1698 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3603 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 1579 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,440,206 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1092 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ǝnolɐM ʎobʍoƆ | 66% | 68 |
| #2 | Gryyphon | 60% | 124 |
| #3 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 57% | 37 |
| #4 | TittieMilk | 57% | 106 |
| #5 | Playing 1 Handed | 56% | 297 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xX_FairyPrinces_Xx | 61 | 0.0173 |
| #2 | Playing 1 Handed | 21 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Z̷̽̋'s | 21 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | ǝnolɐM ʎobʍoƆ | 13 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 12 | 0.0166 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z̷̽̋'s | 922 | 0.25 | 25 min |
| #2 | Playing 1 Handed | 486 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Gryyphon | 334 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | TittieMilk | 268 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | xX_FairyPrinces_Xx | 141 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★HittuLegend | +7.64 | 89 | 34 |
| #2 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | +2.27 | 70 | 44 |
| #3 | Gryyphon | +1.61 | 74 | 62 |
| #4 | xX_FairyPrinces_Xx | -0.87 | 49 | 20 |
| #5 | SHAMMY | -0.92 | 57 | 12 |





