








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 780 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 810 matches | ||
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,436 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3195 | 50% |
| Smokes | 384 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 1363 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1494 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,118,911 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 983 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Useless | 42% | 69 |
| #2 | NorahBorah | 42% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Useless | 42% | 69 |
| #2 | NorahBorah | 42% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NorahBorah | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Useless | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Useless | 125 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | NorahBorah | 47 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Useless | +5.09 | 68 | 49 |
| #2 | NorahBorah | +1.00 | 51 | 39 |
| #3 | marco CaseOpening.com CS.PRO | -4.66 | 3 | 25 |





