








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 359 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 90 matches | ||
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,380 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2001 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1130 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1016 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1233 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $656,722 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halen | 70% | 44 |
| #2 | xdianalandx | 69% | 13 |
| #3 | ryzn | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | gang | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | hype moments and aura | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nyanners | 5 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | Halen | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | darianlul | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | hype moments and aura | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | ryzn | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nyanners | 177 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| #2 | ItsCuurt | 92 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | gang | 86 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | Halen | 67 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | xdianalandx | 55 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halen | +5.43 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | gang | +2.51 | 83 | 78 |
| #3 | xdianalandx | +2.44 | 86 | 74 |
| #4 | ryzn | +1.14 | 73 | 62 |
| #5 | 👁 | +0.82 | 87 | 53 |





