








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1686 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1939 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1013 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1288 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1941 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $422,372 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 137 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKRULL | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | 🆅🅸🅻🅻🅰🅸🅽 | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | nvrm1nd | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | aAa price | 48% | 65 |
| #5 | jkr_dA_King | 47% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | nvrm1nd | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | aAa price | 48% | 65 |
| #5 | jkr_dA_King | 47% | 59 |
| #6 | ♛V4C♛ | 46% | 50 |
| #7 | ☯︎ Covas | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aAa price | 11 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | ♛V4C♛ | 7 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | ☯︎ Covas | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | jkr_dA_King | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | 🆅🅸🅻🅻🅰🅸🅽 | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKRULL | 160 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #2 | ♛V4C♛ | 159 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | aAa price | 135 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | jkr_dA_King | 125 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | ☯︎ Covas | 117 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☯︎ Covas | +2.95 | 69 | 69 |
| #2 | aAa price | +2.77 | 74 | 55 |
| #3 | ◣RafaelDzn◥ | +0.98 | 61 | 63 |
| #4 | SKRULL | +0.87 | 76 | 70 |
| #5 | nvrm1nd | -0.61 | 43 | 47 |





