








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 158 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2722 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,626 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1769 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1876 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1572 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1409 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $732,887 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | "CS.PRO" (>_<) | 54% | 41 |
| #2 | h1ver | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | jkr_dA_King | 48% | 113 |
| #4 | 🆅🅸🅻🅻🅰🅸🅽 | 47% | 45 |
| #5 | ◣RafaelDzn◥ | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 🆅🅸🅻🅻🅰🅸🅽 | 47% | 45 |
| #5 | ◣RafaelDzn◥ | 43% | 40 |
| #6 | aAa price | 42% | 92 |
| #7 | Butarros | 40% | 20 |
| #8 | ♛V4C♛ | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aAa price | 13 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | jkr_dA_King | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | "CS.PRO" (>_<) | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | 🆅🅸🅻🅻🅰🅸🅽 | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | ◣RafaelDzn◥ | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jkr_dA_King | 285 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | aAa price | 238 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | ◣RafaelDzn◥ | 184 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | "CS.PRO" (>_<) | 115 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | ♛V4C♛ | 59 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Butarros | +2.33 | 88 | 47 |
| #2 | ☯︎ Covas | +2.25 | 69 | 63 |
| #3 | h1ver | +1.73 | 73 | 65 |
| #4 | aAa price | +1.45 | 77 | 55 |
| #5 | "CS.PRO" (>_<) | +0.64 | 79 | 61 |





