








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 33 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
818 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 984 | 51% |
| Smokes | 249 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 598 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 96 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $218,101 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i Toad ya | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | Chravis | 63% | 30 |
| #3 | monkey | 58% | 50 |
| #4 | TheEntirePopulationOfBotswana | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | DaxShepard#1Fan | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i Toad ya | +7.68 | 58 | 46 |
| #2 | monkey | +5.67 | 76 | 35 |
| #3 | DaxShepard#1Fan | +1.10 | 32 | 42 |
| #4 | Chravis | +0.93 | 51 | 45 |
| #5 | Caderade | +0.02 | 57 | 54 |





