








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 923 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 692 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8687 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,250 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5535 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5382 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7446 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4887 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,490,323 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1399 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koska_ARTTUGH | 46% | 122 |
| #2 | Han-Satori オーバーロード | 44% | 245 |
| #3 | nAt | 44% | 390 |
| #4 | Tobben | 42% | 387 |
| #5 | Röörinrasvaaja | 41% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MARKRA - Lambonen | 32 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | koska_ARTTUGH | 22 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Tobben | 21 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | nAt | 20 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Han-Satori オーバーロード | 12 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nAt | 1345 | 0.16 | 29 min |
| #2 | Han-Satori オーバーロード | 732 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | MARKRA - Lambonen | 724 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #4 | Tobben | 402 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #5 | Röörinrasvaaja | 220 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MARKRA - Lawnmower | +2.09 | 87 | 63 |
| #2 | Han-Satori オーバーロード | +1.09 | 78 | 60 |
| #3 | nAt | +0.28 | 55 | 58 |
| #4 | MARKRA - Lambonen | -0.86 | 60 | 59 |
| #5 | Tobben | -0.94 | 39 | 62 |





