








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 902 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 322 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,751 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4068 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4361 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2857 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2465 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,695,652 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1477 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mapuuuu | 52% | 130 |
| #2 | MoLtnGG | 50% | 140 |
| #3 | haftradamus | 45% | 145 |
| #4 | Kloppo | 44% | 151 |
| #5 | Kajo | 43% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MoLtnGG | 50% | 140 |
| #3 | haftradamus | 45% | 145 |
| #4 | Kloppo | 44% | 151 |
| #5 | Kajo | 43% | 44 |
| #6 | BizepsxPert | 43% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MoLtnGG | 12 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | haftradamus | 11 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Kloppo | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Mapuuuu | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haftradamus | 660 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #2 | MoLtnGG | 507 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #3 | Mapuuuu | 388 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #4 | Kloppo | 320 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #5 | Kajo | 129 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kloppo | +2.52 | 77 | 61 |
| #2 | MoLtnGG | +2.39 | 66 | 62 |
| #3 | Mapuuuu | +2.08 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | 500gr Gehacktes | +0.22 | 56 | 53 |
| #5 | haftradamus | -0.49 | 58 | 74 |





