








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2521 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,197 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2273 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1541 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1047 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1336 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $484,799 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 413 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoJo | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | WOODSTEP | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | hvnlypeach | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | etalS | 42% | 24 |
| #5 | lar | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoJo | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | WOODSTEP | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | hvnlypeach | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | etalS | 42% | 24 |
| #5 | lar | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | etalS | 2 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | lar | 2 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | WOODSTEP | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | etalS | 56 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #2 | WOODSTEP | 51 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | lar | 33 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | JoJo | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | hvnlypeach | 4 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :^) | +2.60 | 81 | 63 |
| #2 | WOODSTEP | +1.52 | 77 | 58 |
| #3 | JoJo | -0.66 | 32 | 22 |
| #4 | etalS | -0.82 | 63 | 57 |
| #5 | lar | -1.19 | 42 | 44 |





