








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 64 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1944 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1554 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1278 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1750 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1632 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $428,433 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -TLx- | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Opsje | 56% | 102 |
| #3 | isak deez | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | Basick | 53% | 86 |
| #5 | GrinchHatesXmas | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Basick | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Opsje | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | isak deez | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | mo0n | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | friDaN- | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Opsje | 594 | 0.28 | 17 min |
| #2 | Basick | 355 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #3 | friDaN- | 142 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | mo0n | 106 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | isak deez | 104 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Basick | +2.08 | 86 | 69 |
| #2 | Glumanda | +1.16 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | friDaN- | +0.82 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | -TLx- | +0.55 | 85 | 56 |
| #5 | Opsje | +0.28 | 72 | 76 |





