








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 163 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3767 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1640 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2546 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1941 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2079 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,167,020 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 298 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | murf | 58% | 19 |
| #2 | demarcus demetrious the 3ʳᵈ | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | Zer0Gravity | 55% | 31 |
| #4 | SM41L1K | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | spydEr | 53% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | jENiMALcrackers | 39% | 54 |
| #12 | FkN | Nattyb | 38% | 21 |
| #13 | tousle | 37% | 19 |
| #14 | Steggy | 35% | 17 |
| #15 | t.tv/SvenInADen | 30% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spydEr | 253 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | PotatoePeeker TTV | 96 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Zer0Gravity | 94 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | tousle | 82 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Anthony | 65 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _Ex0dus_ | +4.26 | 87 | 55 |
| #2 | t.tv/SvenInADen | +4.09 | 86 | 49 |
| #3 | tousle | +3.77 | 85 | 67 |
| #4 | SM41L1K | +2.61 | 77 | 50 |
| #5 | Zer0Gravity | +1.95 | 71 | 58 |





