








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 595 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Faceit | 103 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2499 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,467 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2717 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3369 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2144 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2237 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $755,609 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yaki.C | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | DeidaraV | 61% | 79 |
| #3 | One_Venere | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | Crysta | 56% | 18 |
| #5 | [-]PandoRa- | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeidaraV | 9 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | PONEY PONEY RUN RUN ! | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Greco 🐻 | 4 | 0.0141 |
| #4 | One_Venere | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | Anto | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PONEY PONEY RUN RUN ! | 191 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | DeidaraV | 157 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Greco 🐻 | 70 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | Natick ☆★✯★☆ | 57 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | One_Venere | 56 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yaki.C | +2.02 | 85 | 75 |
| #2 | Romi | +1.66 | 82 | 63 |
| #3 | Palette | +1.37 | 70 | 72 |
| #4 | DeidaraV | +1.35 | 76 | 57 |
| #5 | Crysta | +0.27 | 64 | 67 |





