








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1563 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,129 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1164 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1309 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1347 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1309 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $397,018 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 96 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gameza | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | C Grinch | 56% | 9 |
| #3 | ✪ [AGBR]MARCO00 | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | 1LS:DDD | 46% | 28 |
| #5 | Ay0n | 44% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ✪ [AGBR]MARCO00 | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | 1LS:DDD | 46% | 28 |
| #5 | Ay0n | 44% | 52 |
| #6 | Kemonito Xantares | 44% | 16 |
| #7 | boombiiee | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ [AGBR]MARCO00 | 16 | 0.0197 |
| #2 | gameza | 10 | 0.0252 |
| #3 | 1LS:DDD | 7 | 0.0112 |
| #4 | Ay0n | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Kemonito Xantares | 2 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1LS:DDD | 158 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #2 | Ay0n | 101 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | ✪ [AGBR]MARCO00 | 101 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kemonito Xantares | 99 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | gameza | 93 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1LS:DDD | +2.12 | 81 | 54 |
| #2 | C Grinch | +1.72 | 85 | 46 |
| #3 | Kemonito Xantares | +0.63 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | gameza | +0.13 | 64 | 67 |
| #5 | C | +0.11 | 71 | 61 |





