








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 254 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2958 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1619 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1914 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1483 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1462 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,275,900 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 720 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuufen | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | eymz | 66% | 73 |
| #3 | DanHol | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | ogge | 62% | 58 |
| #5 | linglong | 57% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Liz | 50% | 16 |
| #10 | MamaMaestro | 50% | 32 |
| #11 | URKANGURKAN | 48% | 50 |
| #12 | Stenqvist ★ | 48% | 88 |
| #13 | DanneMannen | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B.O.B | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | MasterOogway420☑ | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #3 | ogge | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MasterOogway420☑ | 1258 | 0.27 | 39 min |
| #2 | Stenqvist ★ | 349 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | eymz | 291 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #4 | B.O.B | 196 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #5 | ogge | 186 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eymz | +3.23 | 87 | 72 |
| #2 | DanHol | +2.45 | 87 | 53 |
| #3 | DanneMannen | +1.67 | 81 | 59 |
| #4 | B.O.B | +1.57 | 75 | 74 |
| #5 | ogge | +1.37 | 81 | 68 |





