








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 44 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,327 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 346 | 26% |
| Smokes | 338 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 417 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 226 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,114 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hn | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | Pussy_Destroyer_69 | 52% | 77 |
| #3 | xPuz0n | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | PeckWalck | 48% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hn | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | Pussy_Destroyer_69 | 52% | 77 |
| #3 | xPuz0n | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | PeckWalck | 48% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PeckWalck | 20 | 0.0154 |
| #2 | Pussy_Destroyer_69 | 9 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | J0hn | 8 | 0.0187 |
| #4 | xPuz0n | 5 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PeckWalck | 265 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | xPuz0n | 177 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | Pussy_Destroyer_69 | 154 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | J0hn | 23 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PeckWalck | +1.39 | 52 | 72 |
| #2 | beng beng | +0.56 | 39 | 35 |
| #3 | Pussy_Destroyer_69 | +0.49 | 75 | 50 |
| #4 | xPuz0n | -1.14 | 67 | 68 |
| #5 | J0hn | -3.07 | 25 | 16 |





