








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 812 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Renown | 114 matches | ||
| Esplay | 50 matches | 1,906 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3885 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5110 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4691 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1558 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 4136 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,407,527 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 234 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jeneralen | 52% | 299 |
| #3 | Hoff | 50% | 163 |
| #4 | TooooEasy | 48% | 29 |
| #5 | Pretzel | 46% | 207 |
| #6 | Daba | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jeneralen | +1.87 | 67 | 53 |
| #2 | Pretzel | +0.79 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | ZlyZeD | +0.57 | 75 | 74 |
| #4 | TooooEasy | -1.19 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | Hoff | -1.56 | 65 | 47 |





