








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 373 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 451 | 20% |
| Smokes | 660 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 468 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 733 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $579,305 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wave | 49% | 37 |
| #2 | wind | 44% | 63 |
| #3 | Kofalo | 42% | 112 |
| #4 | Zdog | 36% | 11 |
| #5 | El Tigro | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wind | 27 | 0.0222 |
| #2 | Kofalo | 21 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | wave | 7 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | Zdog | 5 | 0.0206 |
| #5 | El Tigro | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wind | 316 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #2 | Kofalo | 130 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | wave | 130 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | El Tigro | 29 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Zdog | 28 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kisn | +3.09 | 85 | 37 |
| #2 | wave | +0.36 | 78 | 65 |
| #3 | Kofalo | -0.32 | 63 | 41 |
| #4 | wind | -0.42 | 76 | 48 |
| #5 | El Tigro | -0.71 | 60 | 32 |





