








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1936 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,509 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2754 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1885 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 956 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1914 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $417,031 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 253 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoshio | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | .X1n0- | 61% | 38 |
| #3 | drayKo | 56% | 71 |
| #4 | Nilo | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | Eg0n | 56% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕱𝖑𝖊𝖝𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖐 | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | .X1n0- | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | drayKo | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Eg0n | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | huhu | 283 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | .X1n0- | 127 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Eg0n | 120 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | 𝕱𝖑𝖊𝖝𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖐 | 115 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | mY_ruleZ | 111 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nilo | +2.97 | 57 | 59 |
| #2 | .X1n0- | +2.37 | 89 | 72 |
| #3 | drayKo | +2.12 | 76 | 58 |
| #4 | 𝕱𝖑𝖊𝖝𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖐 | +1.88 | 69 | 59 |
| #5 | andor | +1.00 | 90 | 60 |





