








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2056 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,659 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2318 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2174 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1453 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1714 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $323,190 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 113 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | mido | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | Cyrano de Bergerac | 44% | 9 |
| #8 | Walouf | 31% | 16 |
| #9 | Juicy | 29% | 14 |
| #10 | Wetek | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙅𝙚𝙭 ♛ | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Wetek | 1 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gaLdNt | +2.32 | 72 | 73 |
| #2 | k1psdg | +1.22 | 62 | 73 |
| #3 | Cyrano de Bergerac | +0.78 | 78 | 53 |
| #4 | ShiMiz | +0.42 | 90 | 66 |
| #5 | Wetek | -0.04 | 72 | 65 |





