








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 461 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2818 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,492 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2487 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1779 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1619 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1607 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $667,523 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 337 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jac0jac0 | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | Spark ♛ | 48% | 25 |
| #3 | Zef | 47% | 137 |
| #4 | Nukes | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jac0jac0 | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | Spark ♛ | 48% | 25 |
| #3 | Zef | 47% | 137 |
| #4 | Nukes | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zef | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zef | 893 | 0.30 | 27 min |
| #2 | Nukes | 125 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | Spark ♛ | 88 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | jac0jac0 | 21 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zef | +1.60 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | gribxXx | +0.60 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | jac0jac0 | -0.02 | 74 | 44 |
| #4 | Spark ♛ | -0.22 | 69 | 65 |
| #5 | Nukes | -1.69 | 61 | 55 |





