








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1535 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,396 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 458 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1354 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 777 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 807 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,247,480 of utility $287 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daddy Sachi | 65% | 69 |
| #2 | Mr.Llama | 59% | 76 |
| #3 | shaney | 59% | 159 |
| #4 | Redeem | 57% | 146 |
| #5 | nadic | 55% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | shaney | 59% | 159 |
| #4 | Redeem | 57% | 146 |
| #5 | nadic | 55% | 123 |
| #6 | LILHEINY | 55% | 124 |
| #7 | i member | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Redeem | 22 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | nadic | 14 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | shaney | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Daddy Sachi | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Mr.Llama | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Redeem | 656 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #2 | nadic | 369 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #3 | shaney | 277 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Daddy Sachi | 223 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Mr.Llama | 169 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shaney | +2.59 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | Redeem | +2.42 | 88 | 57 |
| #3 | Daddy Sachi | +1.40 | 75 | 60 |
| #4 | nadic | +0.86 | 84 | 66 |
| #5 | Mr.Llama | +0.67 | 68 | 56 |





