








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
865 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 522 | 22% |
| Smokes | 640 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 495 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 680 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $272,510 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Praga dos Infernos | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | Silveraa | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | Dumont Romantic | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | ethereal | 50% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Praga dos Infernos | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | Silveraa | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | Dumont Romantic | 54% | 57 |
| #4 | ethereal | 50% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dumont Romantic | 13 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Praga dos Infernos | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | ethereal | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Silveraa | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dumont Romantic | 247 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | ethereal | 202 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | Praga dos Infernos | 122 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Silveraa | 51 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🔥 | +1.45 | 71 | 61 |
| #2 | Dumont Romantic | +0.97 | 71 | 77 |
| #3 | Silveraa | -0.40 | 69 | 58 |
| #4 | ethereal | -1.90 | 50 | 55 |
| #5 | Praga dos Infernos | -2.04 | 35 | 59 |





