








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 63 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,227 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 328 | 15% |
| Smokes | 355 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1049 | 47% |
| Molotovs | 495 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $220,360 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Calaksta | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | Jevk | 53% | 36 |
| #3 | vanss | 41% | 79 |
| #4 | conservative | 34% | 41 |
| #5 | HellF1re24 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | vanss | 41% | 79 |
| #4 | conservative | 34% | 41 |
| #5 | HellF1re24 | 27% | 11 |
| #6 | KittenzExe | 27% | 52 |
| #7 | Rac | 25% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | conservative | 21 | 0.0293 |
| #2 | Rac | 6 | 0.0159 |
| #3 | Calaksta | 5 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | vanss | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Jevk | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jevk | 126 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | vanss | 107 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Rac | 76 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | KittenzExe | 69 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | HellF1re24 | 44 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rac | +5.56 | 88 | 56 |
| #2 | Calaksta | +4.17 | 64 | 52 |
| #3 | Jevk | +3.39 | 57 | 68 |
| #4 | vanss | +1.20 | 58 | 54 |
| #5 | conservative | +1.04 | 81 | 24 |





