








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,367 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1329 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1869 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 904 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1265 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $772,620 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 300 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chez | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | Totan | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Wlzard | 53% | 58 |
| #5 | Royal | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Wlzard | 53% | 58 |
| #5 | Royal | 52% | 21 |
| #6 | Mahaugher | 51% | 69 |
| #7 | Dilian | 50% | 165 |
| #8 | Boopington | 43% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dilian | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Wlzard | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Royal | 2 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 2 | 0.0102 |
| #5 | Mahaugher | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dilian | 483 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #2 | Mahaugher | 250 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Wlzard | 234 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | Boopington | 202 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #5 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 53 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mahaugher | +2.61 | 79 | 72 |
| #2 | Dilian | +2.20 | 76 | 67 |
| #3 | E-van | +0.79 | 75 | 45 |
| #4 | Wlzard | -0.06 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | Royal | -1.41 | 77 | 51 |





