








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1441 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,066 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1775 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1310 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 634 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1347 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,509 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fortnitedabber | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Arcey | 71% | 17 |
| #3 | Mary Ann | 67% | 9 |
| #4 | chatterbox-- | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | ABU BANDIT | 63% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | zerk | 61% | 31 |
| #7 | Noah Hands | 61% | 18 |
| #8 | xn | 57% | 46 |
| #9 | Morty | 53% | 79 |
| #10 | Jeziah | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morty | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | xn | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Arcey | 4 | 0.0117 |
| #4 | Noah Hands | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ABU BANDIT | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xn | 204 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | zerk | 183 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #3 | Morty | 154 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Jeziah | 77 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #5 | ABU BANDIT | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fortnitedabber | +4.20 | 78 | 65 |
| #2 | zerk | +2.91 | 83 | 73 |
| #3 | chatterbox-- | +0.98 | 86 | 48 |
| #4 | Chonne | +0.88 | 82 | 66 |
| #5 | Jeziah | +0.87 | 79 | 75 |





