










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 378 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1055 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,606 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 507 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1421 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 862 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 816 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $916,895 of utility $282 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | %3dASFD | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | Dazzlewind | 48% | 33 |
| #3 | _Bear | 41% | 87 |
| #4 | AK妹 | 41% | 159 |
| #5 | raintty | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | %3dASFD | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | Dazzlewind | 48% | 33 |
| #3 | _Bear | 41% | 87 |
| #4 | AK妹 | 41% | 159 |
| #5 | raintty | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _Bear | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | AK妹 | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Dazzlewind | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | %3dASFD | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AK妹 | 426 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | _Bear | 240 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | Dazzlewind | 83 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | %3dASFD | 77 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | raintty | 35 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | %3dASFD | +4.97 | 82 | 50 |
| #2 | Dazzlewind | +2.83 | 67 | 60 |
| #3 | raintty | +1.36 | 49 | 51 |
| #4 | _Bear | +0.02 | 52 | 58 |
| #5 | AK妹 | -0.21 | 25 | 50 |





