








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 489 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 178 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1920 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,413 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2266 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1884 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1482 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1781 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $740,381 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MisterE | 72% | 29 |
| #2 | w1ltzu | 66% | 29 |
| #3 | nuori jeesus | 65% | 48 |
| #4 | Tapankaikki? | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | Mil | 58% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | KillerMasa | 58% | 146 |
| #7 | MyrkkyPena | 57% | 143 |
| #8 | Progepanda | 54% | 119 |
| #9 | SMUPPE. | 52% | 85 |
| #10 | Poeka | 49% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MyrkkyPena | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | KillerMasa | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Progepanda | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | SMUPPE. | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | nuori jeesus | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MyrkkyPena | 677 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #2 | KillerMasa | 459 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #3 | Progepanda | 186 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | Mil | 160 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | SMUPPE. | 148 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mil | +1.42 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | Ritshaard | +1.09 | 87 | 76 |
| #3 | KillerMasa | +0.91 | 72 | 75 |
| #4 | SMUPPE. | +0.52 | 63 | 74 |
| #5 | MisterE | +0.34 | 51 | 64 |





