








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 462 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 80 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,860 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1870 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2410 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1482 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2098 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $787,975 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 338 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | habZrd | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | Dark | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | N1CK | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | uviete | 62% | 13 |
| #5 | gob | 57% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Tazzy | 35% | 17 |
| #14 | xWrnalp13_ | 33% | 12 |
| #15 | _BmS_ | 23% | 13 |
| #16 | 1pierce | 20% | 15 |
| #17 | T1ck | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | waffle huise wafufle | 6 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | Nyanners | 3 | 0.0127 |
| #3 | GabeDeDryNoodle | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | gob | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Dark | 2 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | waffle huise wafufle | 216 | 0.37 | 5 min |
| #2 | GabeDeDryNoodle | 184 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | gob | 122 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #4 | g1n | 102 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #5 | Dorsoscorpio | 92 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voltage | +2.40 | 81 | 58 |
| #2 | Tazzy | +1.94 | 90 | 59 |
| #3 | Nyanners | +1.10 | 65 | 55 |
| #4 | N1CK | +0.69 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | T1ck | +0.26 | 74 | 56 |





