








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 50 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,754 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 881 | 23% |
| Smokes | 730 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1053 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1090 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $949,838 of utility $233 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | we getting real bizarre | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | BatBatTits *CS.MONEY skinhub.com | 57% | 47 |
| #3 | 愚者 | 55% | 71 |
| #4 | moast rog deat | 50% | 110 |
| #5 | ⅌︎ äqu1no | 48% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | moast rog deat | 50% | 110 |
| #5 | ⅌︎ äqu1no | 48% | 94 |
| #6 | Le022-calibr8 | 46% | 57 |
| #7 | nigden | 34% | 38 |
| #8 | nachi | 25% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⅌︎ äqu1no | 14 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | 愚者 | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | moast rog deat | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | nigden | 6 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | BatBatTits *CS.MONEY skinhub.com | 4 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moast rog deat | 422 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | ⅌︎ äqu1no | 258 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | 愚者 | 157 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | BatBatTits *CS.MONEY skinhub.com | 157 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | Le022-calibr8 | 131 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le022-calibr8 | +3.96 | 77 | 62 |
| #2 | moast rog deat | +3.04 | 77 | 67 |
| #3 | ⅌︎ äqu1no | +1.75 | 74 | 52 |
| #4 | 愚者 | +0.65 | 42 | 44 |
| #5 | BatBatTits *CS.MONEY skinhub.com | +0.12 | 67 | 69 |





