








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 27 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3261 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,971 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2621 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3314 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 1456 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 580 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,202 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 897 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j11a | 52% | 21 |
| #2 | BingusFlip | 52% | 75 |
| #3 | Golf Enthusiast Sulli | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | r⭕⃤Y | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j11a | 52% | 21 |
| #2 | BingusFlip | 52% | 75 |
| #3 | Golf Enthusiast Sulli | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | r⭕⃤Y | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j11a | 5 | 0.0116 |
| #2 | BingusFlip | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | r⭕⃤Y | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BingusFlip | 338 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | Golf Enthusiast Sulli | 120 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | r⭕⃤Y | 34 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | j11a | 22 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j11a | +5.77 | 93 | 38 |
| #2 | r⭕⃤Y | +3.09 | 51 | 63 |
| #3 | Radiance | +0.46 | 68 | 59 |
| #4 | BingusFlip | -0.13 | 71 | 43 |
| #5 | Golf Enthusiast Sulli | -0.54 | 57 | 69 |





