








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 617 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 113 | 18% |
| Smokes | 160 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 177 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 167 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $83,102 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⍟ pan john | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | byht | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | KartofSnitel | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 42% | 36 |
| #5 | YetiBerty | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⍟ pan john | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | byht | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | KartofSnitel | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 42% | 36 |
| #5 | YetiBerty | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | YetiBerty | 1 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheBlackbasha | Pvpro.com | 20 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | KartofSnitel | 20 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #3 | byht | 19 | 0.50 | 0 min |
| #4 | ⍟ pan john | 3 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kys bro | +1.55 | 73 | 40 |
| #2 | byht | +0.73 | 37 | 17 |
| #3 | YetiBerty | -0.48 | 72 | 9 |
| #4 | KartofSnitel | -1.36 | 83 | 51 |
| #5 | ⍟ pan john | -2.16 | 39 | 22 |





