








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 333 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2124 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,304 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4358 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3216 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3071 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2659 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $450,878 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AutumnRain | 70% | 54 |
| #2 | lil yan ola | 62% | 81 |
| #3 | Haren | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | Cosmo | 54% | 189 |
| #5 | Magic Mike | 51% | 236 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Cosmo | 54% | 189 |
| #5 | Magic Mike | 51% | 236 |
| #6 | Rohnson | 50% | 30 |
| #7 | Jæder | 47% | 19 |
| #8 | ic3 | 45% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cosmo | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | ic3 | 7 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Magic Mike | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | lil yan ola | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | AutumnRain | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Magic Mike | 553 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | AutumnRain | 225 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | Cosmo | 202 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | lil yan ola | 118 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | ic3 | 78 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cosmo | +1.84 | 78 | 45 |
| #2 | Magic Mike | +0.78 | 66 | 69 |
| #3 | AutumnRain | +0.08 | 59 | 70 |
| #4 | lil yan ola | -0.17 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | Pömps | -0.33 | 54 | 80 |





