








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 147 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 182 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,188 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4087 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3371 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2787 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2943 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,169 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lexa | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | connie | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | s4zz4 | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | a1pha | 56% | 108 |
| #5 | Ming ✪CSGO corrupt update files? | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lexa | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | connie | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | s4zz4 | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | a1pha | 56% | 108 |
| #5 | Ming ✪CSGO corrupt update files? | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | a1pha | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | s4zz4 | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Lexa | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | a1pha | 556 | 0.24 | 11 min |
| #2 | Ming ✪CSGO corrupt update files? | 82 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #3 | s4zz4 | 80 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Lexa | 49 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | connie | 30 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lexa | +4.42 | 93 | 59 |
| #2 | [MOOGANG] dearlucid | +3.77 | 87 | 70 |
| #3 | Ming ✪CSGO corrupt update files? | +1.93 | 87 | 80 |
| #4 | a1pha | +0.50 | 86 | 55 |
| #5 | s4zz4 | +0.26 | 66 | 68 |





