








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 123 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3128 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,106 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4145 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4619 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3280 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3062 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $844,204 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 366 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | François Hollande | 63 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | Tyranid | 26 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | Gabriel Le Mec Encore Plus Cool | 9 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | FaToM | 7 | 0.0081 |
| #5 | Genschi | 4 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | François Hollande | 772 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #2 | Tyranid | 121 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #3 | FaToM | 90 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gabriel Le Mec Encore Plus Cool | 89 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Genschi | 75 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | François Hollande | +1.79 | 54 | 50 |
| #2 | Airhes_K | +1.53 | 59 | 64 |
| #3 | FaToM | +1.15 | 40 | 58 |
| #4 | Gabriel Le Mec Encore Plus Cool | -0.48 | 32 | 46 |
| #5 | Tyranid | -2.40 | 45 | 27 |





