








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 817 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 515 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7448 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,098 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7007 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6264 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4339 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5488 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,212,894 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 355 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Conrick | 60% | 58 |
| #2 | mooZ^ | 55% | 115 |
| #3 | mazen :> | 53% | 59 |
| #4 | Deathinteresse | 52% | 62 |
| #5 | Ren1 | 51% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ikbims | 18 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Diddily | 14 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | mooZ^ | 8 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Conrick | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Giottoli | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ikbims | 1046 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #2 | Diddily | 862 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #3 | mooZ^ | 674 | 0.29 | 19 min |
| #4 | Giottoli | 376 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | Conrick | 234 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Conrick | +2.09 | 83 | 76 |
| #2 | PYRO | +1.56 | 80 | 70 |
| #3 | Diddily | +0.99 | 60 | 61 |
| #4 | Deathinteresse | +0.05 | 63 | 77 |
| #5 | mooZ^ | -0.12 | 74 | 76 |





