








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2019 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 641 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,617 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3289 | 10% |
| Smokes | 9418 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 9484 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 9426 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,172,259 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2256 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 56% | 128 |
| #2 | secrou | 52% | 63 |
| #3 | Sus | 51% | 341 |
| #4 | Woozy | 50% | 132 |
| #5 | PulgA | 50% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Woozy | 50% | 132 |
| #5 | PulgA | 50% | 136 |
| #6 | iCemANNN*** | 50% | 340 |
| #7 | GeN si | 47% | 85 |
| #8 | Tac | 45% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sus | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | iCemANNN*** | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Tac | 10 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | nil | 9 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | PulgA | 6 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sus | 802 | 0.11 | 17 min |
| #2 | nil | 532 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #3 | PulgA | 491 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #4 | iCemANNN*** | 356 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #5 | Woozy | 354 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | +3.66 | 81 | 66 |
| #2 | secrou | +2.34 | 88 | 76 |
| #3 | Yumai | +0.88 | 68 | 51 |
| #4 | Sus | +0.33 | 79 | 63 |
| #5 | PulgA | +0.11 | 69 | 69 |





