








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 715 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 325 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3787 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,899 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1941 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3531 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3440 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2987 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,198,181 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 914 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brom | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | nil | 58% | 144 |
| #3 | PulgA | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | secrou | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Woozy | 51% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | secrou | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | Woozy | 51% | 97 |
| #6 | Sus | 50% | 190 |
| #7 | Yumai | 50% | 340 |
| #8 | Hydrax_1 | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yumai | 13 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | nil | 9 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Sus | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Brom | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | PulgA | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 593 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #2 | Sus | 426 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | Yumai | 333 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #4 | Woozy | 251 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | PulgA | 171 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | +3.98 | 81 | 65 |
| #2 | secrou | +2.35 | 89 | 75 |
| #3 | Brom | +1.09 | 65 | 70 |
| #4 | Yumai | +0.65 | 67 | 53 |
| #5 | PulgA | +0.44 | 74 | 69 |





