








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1364 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 944 | 31% |
| Smokes | 331 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 671 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1126 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $193,574 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gural ⛟ ☭ ☢ ⚑ ☮ ☯ ® | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | domajneks-- | 48% | 167 |
| #3 | eryczekbdg | 24% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gural ⛟ ☭ ☢ ⚑ ☮ ☯ ® | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | domajneks-- | 48% | 167 |
| #3 | eryczekbdg | 24% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gural ⛟ ☭ ☢ ⚑ ☮ ☯ ® | 11 | 0.0177 |
| #2 | domajneks-- | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | eryczekbdg | 3 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | domajneks-- | 218 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | eryczekbdg | 54 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | gural ⛟ ☭ ☢ ⚑ ☮ ☯ ® | 51 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gural ⛟ ☭ ☢ ⚑ ☮ ☯ ® | +3.36 | 70 | 54 |
| #2 | domajneks-- | +2.80 | 76 | 50 |
| #3 | ✨MrUwUlexoll✨ | -0.40 | 39 | 33 |
| #4 | eryczekbdg | -2.37 | 34 | 52 |





