










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 574 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1818 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,092 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1533 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2152 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1812 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1595 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,500,808 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PAZTY | 48% | 31 |
| #2 | DiracDelta | 45% | 111 |
| #3 | Fayris | 42% | 120 |
| #4 | Bling Bling | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | G0RD0 RE TET0N | 39% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Ainz Ooal Gown | 37% | 188 |
| #9 | SrAdriany | 37% | 52 |
| #10 | Zcuti | 36% | 147 |
| #11 | BeelZirio | 30% | 27 |
| #12 | Boxiuzz | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fayris | 8 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Ainz Ooal Gown | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Hezztia | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | DiracDelta | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | G0RD0 RE TET0N | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fayris | 321 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | DiracDelta | 251 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | Ainz Ooal Gown | 239 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | Zcuti | 184 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hezztia | 142 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bling Bling | +3.66 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | DiracDelta | +3.10 | 66 | 56 |
| #3 | G0RD0 RE TET0N | +2.23 | 39 | 62 |
| #4 | Hezztia | +1.96 | 54 | 52 |
| #5 | Fayris | +0.54 | 61 | 61 |





