








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 541 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2087 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,851 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 304 | 16% |
| Smokes | 276 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 525 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 746 | 40% |
Our logs show you have wasted $557,660 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 967 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taflejk | 50% | 82 |
| #2 | Бартек | 50% | 84 |
| #3 | TurtlePP | 50% | 98 |
| #4 | Cwel | 49% | 200 |
| #5 | Ne0noff | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taflejk | 129 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | Бартек | 121 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Cwel | 84 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | TurtlePP | 77 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ne0noff | 58 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TurtlePP | +4.25 | 85 | 37 |
| #2 | Ne0noff | +2.56 | 86 | 60 |
| #3 | Бартек | +0.65 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | mlbl | +0.42 | 49 | 23 |
| #5 | Cwel | +0.23 | 56 | 52 |





