








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 310 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2376 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3950 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3347 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3936 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $919,901 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moff_G | 58% | 92 |
| #2 | Jayyy | 49% | 346 |
| #3 | Chupacabra Killer | 49% | 369 |
| #4 | BigPapi | 48% | 324 |
| #5 | Silver Ag | 48% | 233 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jayyy | 49% | 346 |
| #3 | Chupacabra Killer | 49% | 369 |
| #4 | BigPapi | 48% | 324 |
| #5 | Silver Ag | 48% | 233 |
| #6 | Scarlet Lightning | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jayyy | 45 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | BigPapi | 19 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Silver Ag | 13 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Moff_G | 13 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | Chupacabra Killer | 9 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chupacabra Killer | 1650 | 0.21 | 39 min |
| #2 | Jayyy | 1154 | 0.16 | 32 min |
| #3 | BigPapi | 903 | 0.13 | 23 min |
| #4 | Silver Ag | 488 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #5 | Moff_G | 247 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moff_G | +2.40 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | Jayyy | +2.09 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | Boop | +1.71 | 77 | 57 |
| #4 | BigPapi | -1.18 | 70 | 57 |
| #5 | Chupacabra Killer | -2.49 | 43 | 71 |





