








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 775 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 331 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4249 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,960 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3784 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4667 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3130 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3379 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,328,213 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 185 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matheus | 55% | 44 |
| #2 | kRIISTer | 54% | 41 |
| #3 | ✪ kraM | 53% | 273 |
| #4 | PapaGabor | 52% | 108 |
| #5 | Chops | 51% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Lurban | 42% | 60 |
| #10 | Kuubz | 41% | 76 |
| #11 | FIERCE | 38% | 73 |
| #12 | Casino Marco | 38% | 29 |
| #13 | T E R A S | 37% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ kraM | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | MadisKalmer | 11 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | andr3w | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | T E R A S | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | Chops | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ kraM | 825 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #2 | MadisKalmer | 599 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #3 | Chops | 250 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | PapaGabor | 193 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | andr3w | 188 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chops | +3.96 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | andr3w | +1.08 | 70 | 60 |
| #3 | ✪ kraM | +0.78 | 48 | 74 |
| #4 | MadisKalmer | +0.63 | 64 | 77 |
| #5 | Lurban | +0.32 | 72 | 51 |





