








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 478 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,548 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 637 | 41% |
| Smokes | 450 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 208 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 253 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $461,150 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sean Bridon | 46% | 28 |
| #2 | börsägarn | 45% | 44 |
| #3 | Joe | 45% | 71 |
| #4 | Junky Johnson | 44% | 63 |
| #5 | Blå Dörren | 40% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sean Bridon | 46% | 28 |
| #2 | börsägarn | 45% | 44 |
| #3 | Joe | 45% | 71 |
| #4 | Junky Johnson | 44% | 63 |
| #5 | Blå Dörren | 40% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joe | 7 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Junky Johnson | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Sean Bridon | 6 | 0.0111 |
| #4 | Blå Dörren | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | börsägarn | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Junky Johnson | 491 | 0.37 | 14 min |
| #2 | Joe | 253 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | börsägarn | 55 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Sean Bridon | 41 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Blå Dörren | 25 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joe | +4.35 | 69 | 59 |
| #2 | Krico | +1.64 | 80 | 40 |
| #3 | Junky Johnson | -0.32 | 40 | 59 |
| #4 | börsägarn | -0.91 | 61 | 38 |
| #5 | Sean Bridon | -2.03 | 40 | 44 |





